Strange Stuff on Saturn

Whoa!

 

 

First spotted by Voyager in 1979. When Cassini arrived in 2006, it was still there.

Kudos to the team on Earth that replicated the hexagonal motion. Pretty cool.

 

High Summer

 

 

 

 

 

 

Since it is fair season, a song from Richard Thompson covering a traditional Irish tune and rebuffing a drunken yob:

 

 

Who Knew Weird Al Was An EM?

Fabulous new video from Weird Al Yankovic parodying Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines".

My English Major wife is a fan with reservations, wincing at the political incorrectness and rather mean-spirited tone (she would never call someone a moron even when their essays are filled with homophone errors. And they do it "alot"). 

 

 

 

 

Grey Molly, however, feels people should just suck it up, get with the program and for Christssakes, learn the right way to use it's and its. Guilty as charged Molls, mea culpa.

Your Imam Don't Dance and Your Ayatollah Don't Rock n' Roll

Apparently, we seem to have more in common with one of our Axis of Evil enemies, Iran, than we thought:

May 21, 2014--Six young people who were arrested in Iran for dancing in a YouTube video to Pharrell Williams' song "Happy" have been freed according to the International Campaign for Human Rights in Iran. The director of the video, however, has not been freed.

According to the Iranian Students' News Agency, Tehran Police Chief Hossein Sajedinia ordered the arrests of the three men and three women for helping to make an "obscene video clip that offended the public morals and was released in cyberspace". Authorities forced the young people to repent on State TV.

Yep, that's obscene all right. Boys and girls together. Girls not properly chaperoned by a male relative. Girls with their heads uncovered. And they're dancing. Together. Such sexual innuendo in those hip shakes. AND THEY ARE HAVING FUN!!!

Sounding pretty familiar isn't it?

 

 



Iranian President Hassan Rouhani reaction echoes that of the Dianne Wiest character in the this film:

"Happiness is our people's right. We shouldn't be too hard on behaviors caused by joy".

Up North, C has a Birthday and Weird Happenings

  

F un stuff-we were invited to our friends Ken and Karen's cottage on Black Lake which is south of Cheboygan and north of Onaway. Karen and I worked together many years ago at the Lansing Art Gallery and have remained pals. Curiously, we share the same birthday-how often does that happen?

I got up early and went out on the dock with coffee and a camera.




42 degrees with morning fog.



  



C and I kayaking, which I had never done before.
We saw a bald eagle-the first time either of us had seen one.


Karen and Ken had a wedding in Detroit so we had the place to ourselves for a couple of days. We went up to Cheboygan for some groceries and I noticed that we were only 15 miles from the Straits. Neither of us had seen the Mackinaw Bridge in years so away we went to Mackinaw City. Despite its given name, the sign as you enter states that it is only a village. Yep, 2010 census had only 806 souls living there but over the course of a summer, nearly 1.5 million visitors stop by. The place is packed with hotels (brief home to the Mackinaw Island daytrippers), fudge shoppes, and other touristy places. The historical park includes a light house and the reconstructed early 18th century Fort Michilimackinac, both overlooking the Mackinaw Bridge.

The Mackinaw Bridge

The Mackinaw Point lighthouse-in service 1892-1957.



Mackinaw Island

We had driven in from the east via Rogers City after visiting C's aunt and uncle in Tawas. About 11 miles west, I saw a sign for Ocqueoc Falls. Hmm, never heard of them. They seemed close to the cottage so one afternoon, C and I checked them out. Turns out they were only 12 miles from the cottage. The falls are the largest in the Lower Peninsula and are quite easy to find thanks to adequate road signs. There was, however, a ton of people, kids, dogs, babies (who brings infants to these things?). Now, the drop of the falls probably isn't more than 5 feet so kids as young as 5 or 6 were flinging themselves over the top. Both C and I noticed that unlike so many other public places where anxieties over lawsuits are acute-not so here. No notice that you jump, swim, frolic or be stupid at your own risk. Neither of us knew that the falls were so small and the river so shallow-we didn't bring swimming gear. The next morning, C's birthday celebration, C says "Let's go to the falls-it's early, maybe we will beat the crowd. It looks like rain, maybe people will stay home." She was right-just 2 couples with very small children and no one in the water. C went in while I, in my beach shoes, stayed in the river taking photos. You could get quite close to the falls-how often does one get such an opportunity?

Looking up river from the main falls. There are a series of smaller cascades both
above and below the falls.

The main falls.

Directly above looking over the edge of the right side of the falls.

The Water Girl in her element. As you can see, the water is not very deep. She had a blast body surfing. She described the experience as rejuvenating-much more than a hot tub.

Downstream looking back at the main falls.

Happy 55, sweetie!

Our friends catching the final rays of the day.

Weird happenings in the North Country

One night we were checking out the full moon when we saw a bright object flash streaking across the sky. It was big, close, low to the horizon and silent. What the hell was it?

-Meteor (fireball)- Most of the witnesses were dubious-too big and close. No arc in its flight path. Just seemed artificial. It appeared, streaked then went out.

-Failed firework rocket that didn't explode-None of us heard it launch nor did we see it fade out as it dropped.

-Space junk-This didn't occur to me until I searched online for postings from other witnesses. Turns out a huge piece of junk came down that night...in Australia.

Artist's Depiction

We're driving down US 23 between Cheboygan and Mackinaw City and I notice these odd plumes veering off the tips of the trees that border the road. I also see what appears to be an elongated funnel directly in front of me. C is conked out taking a cat nap so I just ignore it-getting on in the day. Probably just seeing some refraction through the windshield.

Well, I keep seeing them and wondered if at some lonely point in the road, all the power in the car was going to quit. Damn-no aerosol paint can in the trunk to X the spot. I check my watch and it hasn't stopped so when traffic let up, I slow and took a good look at the nearest plume. It's made up of tiny dots! These things are made up of zillions of little insects!!! C has awoken by this point and I ask her to verify. Yep, they're there. So who knows-gnats or "no-seeums"-why they were hanging around the trees like that and what explains the funnel shape over the road: It's a mystery.

Artist's Depiction

A pretty good vacation! Good friends, nice cottage, a chance to get out on the water, a birthday to celebrate, a natural water park and a couple of mysterious happenings.

Oh yes and a rainy evening, imbibing adult beverages and making up new rules for Pictionary. Good times! Many thanks to Ken and Karen for the invitation, their good company and tasty cooking.

Goodbye Mr. C

With relief, we bid a fond farewell to Mr. C. We're so glad we managed to keep him alive although I killed his tree. His owner returned from his trip home to Shanghai and reunited with Mr. C a couple of days ago. Mr. C was an odd critter-didn't interact, was uniformly stoic except occasionally opening his mouth wide and emitting a  sustained hiss. This usually occurred  when I evidently displeased him while spritzing water on his tree, which I thought was a tad ungrateful: chameleons commonly consume their water as it drips from leaves. He also behaved this way when C (no relation) opened his enclosure to shake out his daily meal of crickets. Well, just can't please you by providing the essentials of life.

He didn't do much except to sit on a couple of  bare  branches that I positioned over the tree in his enclosure. He spent most of his day basking in the UV lamp occasionally moving from one branch to the other, onto the enclosure screen, down into the tree to hunt for a cricket. That's it. Oh, he curled and uncurled his tail a lot.

You can imagine my concern one morning over coffee and the Times when out of the corner of my eye, I caught motion in his enclosure and heard a dull thud. Oh no! Dude, did you have the big one? (The pet shop reptile guru warned chameleons are prone to heart attacks especially in response to sudden movement). Of course, Mr. Stoic had nothing to say which is so different from our crew who are quite vocal about so many things. Eventually, I saw him slogging up his tree. I was puzzled-I hadn't made a sudden move. He was eating well. His color was good and bright (when ill or stressed, their color can dull). So, the next time I was buying crickets, I asked the reptile guru. "Oh, that's dropping behavior" he replied. "A bit of evolutionary development: if a chameleon has his sights on a meal or is faced with a predator, they will flee by dropping off a rock or a cliff up to 20 feet." Whoa!  "And, they will puff themselves up like an inner tube to cushion the fall."  Presumably, they probably bounce a couple of times. I wonder if there is a vid on YouTube?

His eating behavior is well-documented-the freakishly long tongue whips out, grabs dinner and retracts. C at first was not too keen on witnessing the crickets meeting their destiny. Furthermore, the sound of Mr. C eating them resembled the crunching of potato chips. Of course my response to this was to immediately bring up the ancient Lay's ad: Can't Just Eat One. Mr. C heartily agreed. Over time however, much like gawking at the aftermath of an accident, C's curiosity won out in fascination of watching the tongue at work. During her final feeding before we took him home, she thought something was wrong. He lunged at a cricket but suddenly stopped like a dog who had come to the end of his leash. Oh no, no Mr. C, don't croak on us now!!! Turns out she had closed the door on his tail after depositing supper. Sorry dude! She quickly opened the door and Mr. C, stoic as ever, moseyed up the branch and curled his tail. No harm, no foul.

So,  Mr. C-take care, good luck, it was good to know you.

Happy Solstice/Saturday Night Music

Perfect summer music: from 1962, the Drifters-Up on the Roof. Lyrics by Gerry Goffin who passed this week, music by his wife, Carole King.

2 Guys Talkin'

B-Hey, is it nice and warm in here! Friggin' freezing in the house. And this is June?

J-Yeah, we keep Mr C's room toasty. How are you feeling?

B-Better thanks. Still a bit stiff in that joint and I don't have the power I used to have to jump. Getting old I guess.

J-Well, Mom and I were pretty concerned. I'm sorry we didn't get you to the docs sooner but we didn't know. And after Molls evidently recovering from the same thing, we thought you'd be ok.

B-No worries, man. I thought it would clear up by itself too. Then I got this golf ball thing growing on my haunch and I was concerned as well.

J-So, what happened?

B-Big Black jumped me.

J-Ohhh, we wondered. Same one that nailed you in the face during the snow canyon fight?

B-Yep, same bastard.

J-He was trying to come in through the portal?

B-Actually, it started with Princess.

J-What??!! Did she get Big Black to beat you up??? That lil bit...

B-NO NO-Big Black was moving on her!!

J-Nooo, you mean....no....she's never in heat, she's been fixed...

B-It can still be an act of asserting dominance.

J-So what happened?

B-It's a nice spring night-I'm chilling on the front porch-you guys had gone to bed and up tearing across the lawn comes Princess with something big right behind her. She hits the portal in one go. Well, I was a bit startled because I was drowsing and when I am fully focused, I realized Big Black is on the bench looking into the portal. Saying all sorts of things to Princess and to The Chunk as well. Filthy stuff. I crouched and growled and he just turned and said “Oh, if it isn't Small Stuff. Want some more of what you got this winter? Yeah, I think that's a good idea” and he was on me before I knew it. Whupped me across the head with the hardest right hook I have ever had. Man, I was seeing stars and as I turned to get away, I heard him roar “I am gonna bite your ass off, boy”. I felt him chomp down on my right haunch. I think you heard me scream because the girls said later that you came out into the library. Anyway, after he bit me, he laughed, said “so long Small Stuff, I'll be getting back to your womenfolk later” and ran off.

J-What an ass!!!

B-No shit. He got me good, man and I was in a world of hurt. I was so grateful that you saw me and opened the door. I'm not sure I could have made it through the portal. The rest you know.

J-So, that's why the Calico has been decent to you: she OWES you. I take it that this means something to you guys.

B-It sure as hell does and believe me-I will remind her of it until the end of my days. Ha! It's already just killing her to be nice.

J-LOL I bet. Well, what's fair is fair. Sorry about your fur-gawd they really shaved a chunk off.

B-Whattya gonna do. Shrug. It's growing back and really, at my age-I don't give a shit. But having said that, I appreciate you not posting a pic.

J-No problem-I'm self-conscious enough for both of us, lol. You having problems at The Diner?

B-Yeah, can't jump worth a damn. Benny has been kind enough to put the bowl on the chair for me. He is a pretty decent guy.

J-Yeah he is.

J-Man, just how many fights have you been in? When they shaved you, they found a bunch of scars. You really are an old gladiator.

B-Just how it is. I don't take shit from no one but it does seem like trouble comes to me much of the time.

J-Just what is Big Black's problem?

B-Shrug-some cats are like that. I suspect he was cut late. And he is big. The big ones can either be really laid back because they know no one will mess with them or they get these oversized egos and swagger around like they still have them swinging. (eye roll) You know the type.

J-Ayup. Well, I am glad he doesn't live next door. Gawd, what a nightmare.

B-It would be. Princess would never go out and be more of a nervous wreck than she already is. The Grey-I dunno, man-I don't think she has fought much but she is one helluva killer. I think she would be one tough broad in a street fight. You know, she has been quite maternal towards me and I have quite touched by that. 

B-At any rate, it would be some tense times around here. And, I am just getting too old for this crap.

J-Sigh. I know buddy. Part of me would advise you to just run but I know that's not in your nature. Ronins do not retire.

B-Well, you are romanticizing this a bit but I appreciate the thought.

B- That reptile doesn't do much does he? You know, I have had no communication with him which is a first. I've always been able to talk to others. Not this guy.

J-I know-he is curious isn't he? I guess he prefers to keep to himself.

B-Yep. To each his own. Welp-how about a snack before I take a nap?

J-Sure, bud. We just opened a can. So how long before the Calico cracks and reverts to her old meanness?

B-Oh, any day now. It's ok. All I have to do is point back to the haunch and watch her squirm with shame. Fabulous! The gift that will never quit giving!

Boy, Are They In Trouble

One of our enduring jokes here in America concerns our meteorologists: these folks can be inaccurate a good chunk of the time and still keep their jobs. Haven't we all  watched the guy on channel 6 forecast a 20% chance of rain while it is coming down in buckets outside our window? WTF!! we mutter.

Well, our boys and girls in the polyester blazers should start counting their blessings and be thankful they aren't working in North Korea. Good forecasting there could be a matter of life or death.

According to North Korea's official newspaper Rodong Sinmun, glorious leader Kim Jong Un paid a visit to the country's meteorological institute for a chat. Or rather a rant about the poor forecasting. It seems it has finally come to his attention that his people have been starving for the past 20 years for a variety of reasons including those weather related. It also appears that he does not have his father's special powers (it was officially reported that Kim Jong Il could control the weather based on his moods*).

While he did cut the weathermen some slack by citing poor equipment (most likely 50 year old hand-me-downs from the Chinese) and outdated methodology (most likely 50 year old hand-me-downs from the Russians), Kim Jong Un by all reports was red-faced and bellowing at the ashen-faced staff to "Get It Right". The nation's security and people's well-being was dependent on accurate forecasting, he further asserted thus implying inaccuracy could theoretically be considered treasonous.

Rodong Sinmun released this photo of the incident and thanks to our contact in the NSA, we have a transcript of what was said at the time it was taken. While the caption is fictitious, it's absurd reasoning of introducing coin-flipping as a valid addition to the scientific method comes uncomfortably close to our reality of science denying politicians. Climate change?What climate change. Boy, are we in trouble.



"How hard can it be? If you say there is a 50% chance of it raining, then I should be

able to flip a coin anytime during the day and have rain half the time. I'm not asking

for much, just that you should be right. What am I paying you for? Do I have to do

everything myself??"


Photo: Rodong Sinmun-truly, I didn't make this up.



Deja-vu Thirty-Nine Years Later

1975-North Vietnamese troops enter Da Nang, South Vietnam



2014-ISIS Troops enter Mosul, Iraq

Same mistake, same outcome 39 years apart. The guys running the show in Washington just don't learn. The only good news: Vietnam cost us 58,209 lives, Iraq 4,804. I doubt in 20 years, ISIS or whatever manifestation it may be in at that point will be as inclined to be the money-making buddies with Nike as the Vietnamese were.



Top photo-Wikipedia
Bottom photo-Reuters

 



June 5, 1989

How the world remembers:

 

 

How the Chinese government would like world to remember:

 

Nothing to see here, nothing happened, move along.

  

AP Photo/Jeff Widener

 

 

 

 

 

 

Those Crazy Americans or Our First World Problems on Parade!

What is WRONG with people??!!

by KING 5 Seattle Healthlink

Posted on May 9, 2014 at 6:11 pm

Updated Tuesday, May 13 at 10:37 am

Since the boom in the local foods movement, experts at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have noticed a spike in something else: salmonella.

 

It seems more people are getting sick from their backyard chickens, and it may be because they are getting a little too friendly with their flock.

Chickens are not only a source of fresh eggs. They can also be a source of sickness.

“People just don’t know that healthy chickens, ducks and other poultry carry germs like salmonella,” said Casey Barton Behravesh, a zoonotic disease expert with the CDC.

Over the past two decades, there have been more than 2,000 reported cases of salmonella linked to live poultry. Five people have died.

The latest outbreak was linked to chicks supplied by a mail-order hatchery in Ohio. More than 60 people in 23 states have fallen ill, including one in Washington. The true number affected is likely higher, but so far there have been no deaths.

“For every single case of salmonella infection that’s reported to public health officials, CDC studies estimate that there’s as many at 29 others out there,” said Behravesh.

A majority of patients are young children. Cases often spike after Easter when parents order chicks as gifts.

Most illnesses occur when chicken owners treat their birds like family, bringing them into their homes. More than one in 10 owners admits to kissing their birds.
 And I wonder how many kiss on the lips???-editor

“Don’t kiss the bird!” said Behravesh. “You can show your affections in other ways with a simple pet or something like that.”

While there’s no need to limit your interactions with chickens, do not let them in the house and wash your hands.

The hatchery released a statement saying they are working with the USDA on a voluntary salmonella reduction program.

Happy Anniversary

Two years! Our friends Steve and Sue sent a lovely card entitled Owl and the Pussycat: The Journey Continues. Yep, that's us-an unlikely couple of a Water Girl and a Woodland Creature. To invoke both last year's celebration in Bimini and Mr. Lear's enduring poem:

 

 

They danced by the light of the moon.

 

 

Heidi Swedberg and Daniel Ward performing a charming ukulele duet

and inspired reading of the Owl and the Pussycat.

 

Happy Anniversary to you, with much love, my dear Watergirl.

 

 

Original photo courtesy of Gizmodo.com.au



Same Time Next Year

At our feeder on Sunday afternoon: Rose Breasted Grosbeak

 

 

A better photo from Wiki:

 

 

About this time every year since we moved to our house, this little guy has stopped by for a day or two. He winters in Mexico/Central America and flies back here to breed. Helluva long way to go to perpetuate the species! I wonder if it's the same bird or perhaps this location was passed along in the genetics of his offspring. Or, do birds have Trip Advisor?



 

AVIAN TRIPADVISOR

 

 

Name: Sunset Drive Wildlife Habitat  *****

Owners: C and Jeff

Location:  42.73N 84.65 W

 

Description: Lovely habitat for residence or stopover. Healthy food, comfortable lodging. Fairly quiet residential area close to large woods, ponds, stream.

 

Amenities: Feeder, birdbath with larger pool nearby, trees of all sizes, shrubs, good undergrowth. Expanse of lawn for wormers.

 

Reviews:

 

***** I live here all year and I can't say enough good about this place. C and Jeff are great, the feeder is always filled even when it's cold and snowy. They even put out extra goodies like suet and bread.

A. Chickadee

 

**** I don't know what Sparrow's problem was-we had a wonderful time and will return next year. A. Bluebird

 

Trip Advisor administrator: A. Sparrow has been blocked due to violation of site agreement.

 

F-U Red!!! A. Sparrow.

 

Yes, it does seem that Sparrow is holding a grudge. And who knows this really happened. He could just be a troll. Poor baby didn't get anyone to mate with so he's lashing out. Go away sparrow. A. Cardinal

 

Re-Re-Deathtrap-Oh, it's always easy for you to say-you big birds never get picked on. Well, let me tell you, I lost 3 cousins at that place. Watch out for the fat, grey cat-who knew that lump could be so quick. A. Sparrow

 

Re-Deathtrap-Sure, we saw the cats but they never bothered us. You do need to keep your wits about you at all times, for crying out loud. What a whiner. A. Blue Jay

 

* Are you birds insane? What they don't tell you and evidently no one has had the brains to mention-this place is a damn deathtrap. THEY HAVE 3 CATS!!! They don't call it SUNSET for nothing!!! You stay there and it will be your last day on Earth. A. Sparrow

 

*****Great place, good chow. Plenty of tall trees to holler at the ladies. I stay here year-round. A. Cardinal

 

***** Very nice-I stop by every year after wintering in Mexico. Tasty food and the bird bath is always wonderful. I love the nearby pond. A. Grosbeak

 







Spring

Molls murdered a baby squirrel today bringing it in to C's study as an offering. Poor thing-it was barely six inches long. I buried it in the back 40. I need to get over these things-the crew do what they do as they are hunters but this event shadowed the entire day. Nice day to work, though-mid-60's-I screened the compost pile began the first year we arrived-gosh, it's four years. Just let the day flow-weeded, moved stuff out of the shed-the planters, the bird bath. Wind came up around 3pm and it turned cold. Mr. C seems to have adapted ok to his new digs in my study-he is beginning to molt-thank goodness C looked it up otherwise I would have freaked. He is a strange critter unlike the katters with whom one interacts. He just spends his days slowly moving around, occasionally zipping out his extraordinarily long tongue to snag a cricket for a snack. Otherwise, seemingly unmoved by anything I do despite the warnings of pet store employees-"Oh, they are difficult. Prone to heart attacks. Anything can set them down a fatal path". Great.

Saturday Night Music

War's 1971 existential "Slippin' into Darkness"
begins with a piney woods Baptist testifyin' slamming
 into some of the best funk grooves of the decade.
Can I get a witness??!!!! OOOOhh take my mind beyond the trees!!!
Mercy!

The Boss covers traditional antebellum negro spiritual:  "O Mary Don't You Weep" 

Saturday Night Music

Dana Falconberry's Possum Song

Two Guys Talkin'

B-What the hell, man!  

J-Well, hello to you too.

B-What is going on around here?

J-I don't know what you are talking about. Calm down and watch your claws.

B-Don't be coy with me pal. Mom's not here very much and you are here quite a bit. And what the hell is going on in the basement?

J-You are going to give yourself a stroke. Now relax. It's end of term so Mom is working a lot.

B-Ok, what's your excuse? Why aren't you leaving in the morning?

J-Well, bud-I lost my job.

B-WHAT!!?? Are we going to starve? Are we going to become homeless?? Oh, oh, oh.

J-Dude, stop it. Mom is still working-we are going to be ok. The food dish won't go empty although everyone could lose a few lbs.

B-Yeah, well you resemble that remark.

J-My, we can get ugly. Look, the company I worked for is moving to Florida and no one up here was invited to go along. It's all good-I'm going back to school to get training for a new job and in fact, I'll be adhering more to my old schedule for the next couple of weeks. And...after next week, Mom will be home all the time until August.

B-Yaayyyy!!!

J-Well, I hope that is for both of us.

B-Uhh, sure-glad for you, man.

J-That's not exactly effusive. Does everything revolve around food and attention with you?

B-Is there anything else? Remember, we don't give a shit about war and building stuff like you apes. Oh, you need to add sleeping to that list. Yep, that pretty much sums it all up, thank you very much.

B-Now, what about the basement and yes those are my back claws in your upper thigh.

J-Are you trying to rendition me, asshole?
 

B-Do I look like Rumsfeld to you? C'mon, now. I just want you to share.

J-All right, all right. Mom agreed to help out one of her Chinese students.

B-By taking care of his small tree that is enclosed in a screened-in box? Hmm, this is beginning to smell.

J-Sigh, well what goes in the box is the guy's chameleon.

B-Say what?

J-Yep. A reptile.

B-HAVE YOU TWO COMPLETELY LOST YOUR MINDS ??

J-Now come on, you are getting worked up for nothing. He doesn't do anything, just hangs on to the side of the box.

B-Ya know, we tolerate you guys feeding those filthy birds and those tree rodents but now a reptile.

J-At least it's not a snake.

B-Dude (shudder) don't even mention those things -they give me the willies.

J-Me too. Look, it's only for a couple of months, we are closing off the basement bedroom-he won't bother you-you won't bother him. Everything is cool.

B-I dunno man, I don't like all these changes.

J-(scritching behind an ear) I know buddy. It's going to be ok. What are the girls thinking?

B-Well, Psycho thinks it's something for her-typical, eh? And Fatso thinks it's something against her although I have no idea how she connected the dots and come up with that.
 

J-He'll be gone before you guys know it. 

B-What is he called?

J-Oddly, the student didn't give him a name. We call him Mr. C.

B-What?

J-Like Mr. T-he's kinda has this gruff looking exterior plus Mr. C for Mr. Chameleon.

B-That's lame but what are you gonna do. I don't know this Mr. T anyway.

J-You don't know the crappy 80's TV show The A Team?

 B-How about some visuals?

B-Uhh, the reptile wears jewelry?

J-No, that's just a joke. Geez.

B-I don't see the resemblance.

J-Are you purposely being obtuse?

B-No, I just think it's stupid.

J-Well, la-de-da. Why don't you just leave?

B-Boy haven't we been in a mood. You've been mean.
 

J-No, you have been extra needy and I have been busy.

B-Oh yes, those British spy series on You Tube must be part of your “studies”.

J-You can leave now. Don't let the door hit you in the tail.

B-Ok fine, I'll go see Mom.

J-She's busy-leave her alone.

B-I'll just go by her door and howl.

J-Nothing new about that. Run along now.

B-No snack?

J-Nope, you have a 'tude-no snack.

B-Oh and who has a 'tude? Fine, I'll tell Lard Ass to start bringing live mice in the house. You'll like that-with their bacteria-laden feces all over the place that you are so paranoid about. Hearing them scratching behind the drywall. Yeah, enjoy, asshole.

J-Oh for Christssakes, ok-c'mon-I'll get you a snack. Being 'effin blackmailed by a damn cat.

B-A proven strategy. Ahhh, score another one for the felines. A fresh can if you don't mind my good man-none of that corked, end of the can stuff you have been serving up. 

J-Hmm been watching Downton Tabby have you?
 

B-They do have the correct idea when it comes to staff.