WE IMAGINE ZUCKERBERG'S META MARKETING SPOT

Last week, dear old Mark Zuckerberg introduced to the world his latest product to help mankind. After all, that is the obnoxious conceit of this man whose internal jingle is the ditty from the 1971 Coca Cola commercial "I'd like to teach the world to sing (in perfect harmony)". In his latest endeavor, META, he proposes we escape all the crap in the world by putting on virtual reality glasses ($200 from Facebook), buy a subscription and spend hours with favorite avatars for people and places. I can imagine the kind of drooling this concept evoked in the world's facist leaders. Get people hooked on this device, create incentives for them to spend more and more time in virtual reality all the while, you and your cronies rape, pillage, terrorize, murder with impunity and turn the real world into a hell on earth. Think of the synergies! Think of the profits!

I think the following would be a fabulous META ad geared to address FOMO anxieties of so much of the 1st World population.

With many apologies to:

Songwriters: Hatch Anthony Peter

Downtown lyrics © Welbeck Music Ltd., Smack Hits, Universal Music Works, Warner/chappell Music Ltd.

 

Keywords are bold, in red and italicized.

 

When you're alone and life is making you lonely
You can always go
META
When you've got worries all the noise and the hurry
Seems to help I know
META

Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city
Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty
How can you lose?

The light's so much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares

So go META 

Things will be great when you're

META
No finer place for sure

META
Everything's waiting for you (META,META)

Don't hang around and let your problems surround you
There are movie shows 

META 

Maybe you know some little places to go to
Where they never close
META

Just listen to the rhythm of a gentle bossa nova
You'll be dancing with 'em too before the night is over
Happy again

The light's so much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares

So go META
Where all the lights are bright
META
Waiting for you tonight
META
You're gonna be alright now (META) 

META

META

META

META  

And you may find somebody kind to help and 

understand you
Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand
To guide them along
So maybe I'll see you there
We can forget all our troubles, forget all our cares

So go
META

 Things will be great when you're
META
Don't wait a minute more
META
Everything's waiting for you (META,META)

META

META
META

META

META

META 

META

META