Two Guys Talkin'

B-What's shakin'!!!
J-Dude! What's up?
B-Long time, man!
J-Yeah, stuff going on. Happy Spring! Good to see the croak-asses in bloom.
B-You too! So glad the white crap is gone.Croak-asses, lol.
J-Oh, I hear ya. Damn it was cold.
B-You're telling me-I'm getting too old for this.
J-Well, at least you didn't get beat up on the path like last year. 
B-Me too! I haven't seen that asshole in awhile.
J-I haven't seen anyone, Mean White, BrownTigerFluffyTail...
B-Everyone's gone to ground. It was nice Monday. You were in shorts, you crazy ape.
J-Ohhh it was sooo nice out. Back to the cold now, sigh. 
B-Well how is Mom? We've been concerned-she hasn't seemed herself.
J-Hanging in there, thanks for asking. Only 3 more chemos to go. I'll be so glad when it is done with.
B-I'm sure she feels the same. She's been good at giving attention though, and Molls and I have spent extra time with her. Have we been too much?
J-A bit, to be honest but how would you know how to gauge? Keep up the good work and don't worry about it.
B-We don't want to be pests.
J-Not to worry. She'll let you know, lol.
B-How have you been holding up? 
J-Doing fine, man-thanks. Had my usual February depression but that has past.
B-How's the job search?
J-Meh. 
B-Hmm, that good?
J-Meh.
B-OOOOKkkkkkkkkkkkkk how about dem Tigers?
M-Hello boys
B-Madame
J-(surprised) Molls!!
J-(side of mouth to Bin) my we're chummy!
B-(side of mouth) Hush!
B-Tis a pleasant day, Madame! You are looking well!
M-Thank you Monsieur Bin. Hello mon cher Jeff.How is Maman?
J-Uhh..
B-(Mom you idiot!)
J-Oh, Molls-she is better right now. She is in the good period before the next chemo. Thanks for asking.
J-(buddy, you have some explaining to do)
B-(I will, go with the flow!)
M-(sitting down, upright) Poor woman, she has been feeling so poorly, I haven't know what to do for her.
J-Oh, Molls-you have been just fine. She appreciates your attention.
M-She helped birth my kittens you know and my poor dead Minn...
J-I know Molls.
M-What are you boys up to-why have you brought out this big shiny thing out of the shed?
J-First grilling of the season!
M-MMMMM-some tasty meat, I expect? Of course nothing for Maman, she is such a strange thing denying herself meat and dairy. I do not understand her.
J-Some nice pork tenderloins Molls. And asparagus,spring onions and mushrooms.
B-Mmm, yummers-piggy.
M-Oh, pig does sound tasty. I can't abide vegetables though.
J-But you eat grass..
B-(digs an elbow into J,uh oh)
M-(eyes narrowing) sharply: You know that is a digestif!!
J-Ah, yes. Oh course, Madame.
M-You wouldn't want me to upchuck all over your precious rug would you?
B-(Jesus, now you've done it!)
J-You are most correct, Madame and I apologize...(for whatever the hell has upset you)
M-I would greatly appreciate a scrap once you're done-not too spicy or too much pepper mind you.
J-It would be a pleasure, Madame.
M-(getting up and stretching) Well, au revoir boys, I'll see you at suppertime. I'm going in for a nap.
J-Until then Molls.
B-So long Madame.
J-What the hell was that about? Since when have you two been cozy? Madame?? Really? After, the Chunk, the Meat Loaf, Fatso...
B-We have a bit of an understanding these days, a detente.
J-Oh really? Mom so her slug the shit out of you the other night.
B-Shrug-she remains tempestuous. It is her nature.
J-My, we're forgiving. Ok, man-spill the beans.
B-You aren't going to like it.
J-What?"
B-What I just said. Ok, to be more specific, the circumstances of our new relationship.
J-Oh gawd. Let me hear it.
B-It was the Calico. Molls was very upset and offended by what the Calico did.
J-What did Tomi do.
B
J-Bin-what Did Tomi do, man?
B-She made fun of Mom.
J-What??
B-She made fun of Mom's lack of hair.
J-Why? I don't understand.
B-She was full of her self and  being snarky and made a comment about Mom being bald.
J-Does she not know the circumstances?
B-Not sure if she grasps it all. It's all about the look, I guess. I told you that feline was shallow.
J-This is beyond shallow-this is a serious lack of empathy-I realize you folk don't excel with this but still-a little respect. Unbelievable.
B-I was shocked. Molls was absolutely beside herself. She told me one freezing night on the back porch.
J-Well, this explains all the punches Molls has been throwing at Tomi. We thought it was Molls being irritable.
B-Nope. 
J-I am shocked. Tomi was her first.
B-Yeah and she never got over Mom getting any other.
J-She seemed to get along with Molls.
B-Well, it suited her. Another gal around to have sisterly feelings with. She couldn't be too mean to Minn being he was Molls' son. But once I came around..
J-We knew there was an alliance.
B-It was understandable. I was an outsider. Plus, God forgive me-I am not French,lol.
J-Of course.
J-I am so disappointed in her. How could she? 
B-I'm telling you, man-that feline is nuts.
J-This is really going to hurt Mom.
B-That's why we have kept quiet. Molls tolerates her but she will never trust her even if she is a fellow Parisian.
B-You notice Tomi has been keeping her distance, haven't you?
J-Indeed I have. She has really been a skitty kitty.
B-Well, I think she has caught on somewhat especially seeing Molls hanging out with me more. She knows something is up but not truly connected the dots. She ain't that bright.
J-What am I going to do?
B-Nothing you can do-what done is done. 
J-Stupid, stupid girl.
B-Ayup. Go get yourself a refill and let's start cooking.
J-Ok, man. Unbelievable.
B-She is what she is. You will just have to forgive her.
J-She needs to know what she has done.
B-Ain't gonna sink in. She is selfish, vain and wholly self-centered. And nuts. You can't reason with nuts.
J-I suppose not.
B-I'm sorry man-I know she was your daddy's girl and you liked the attention. But, there is not much there.
J-Evidently. C'mon, I'll get you a snack.
B-It's ok-let's get to cooking (tailing J's leg). Mmmmm piggggg.